Observations

Tag: Observations

And his use of my signature catchphrase, “Smell you forever because you stink that bad.” I knew I should have had that copyrighted.

Some part of my subconscious is absorbing everything though, right?

Try it again and think about every stock market in America crashing into fiery flames like the Hindenburg.

Is he “ugly-hot” or does his face bear the mark of an impish, Germanic evil?

Are you looking for anything specific today? Just browsing? Awesome—mind if I watch from the other side of the room?

Remember how excited you were about the pottery wheel that’s now a hat rack? Or the sourdough starter you ate raw on day three?

Be still my heart, for chivalry is not dead—merely wheezing along at three miles per hour.

3:34 AM: Still up. I’ve repeated the song so many times that I’m starting to see some of its lyrical flaws.

It was good to hear the inside of my mouth also looked "healthy, but super grody, you know, like mouths are."

THE BOSS: This is your BOSS. It’s in all caps, because he (it’s a man, always a man) wants you to be clear that he is your BOSS.

Solar eclipse pathways for the next twenty years, so that you can prepare ahead.

If your therapist asks you whether Jason is your father, calmly explain that he’s your college friend’s old roommate.