Would You Rather? Return to Office Edition
Would you rather spend 25% of your paycheck on Everlane’s "Sims 2 Fall/Winter ‘23 collection” or trompe l'oeil mascara onto your face with a free Zoom filter?
Would you rather spend 25% of your paycheck on Everlane’s "Sims 2 Fall/Winter ‘23 collection” or trompe l'oeil mascara onto your face with a free Zoom filter?
"It wasn't so much a specific question, but her vibe was like–" DON'T.
Making January fly by depends upon how much, or how little, you acknowledge in your mind that it's actually January.
It’s a zero-sum game out there. Every piece of candy you don’t get goes into the gaping, cavity-filled maw of some other kid.
I scroll through my Venmo feed with fervor, finding out more about your lives from a cash app than I do from the photos you share on Instagram.
When a store cashier asks if you found everything you need, it is against the law to say, ''No, I couldn't find granola with almonds and raisins.''
Let me guess, you didn’t want to carry it around with you for the rest of your walk and you planned on picking it up on your way home?
Now, I’ll admit. I knew the words that I was singing were not in fact “words.” They were more like syllables strung together.
I woke up today thinking it was Thursday, but it turns out it might be Tuesday. I’m not really sure because both of them start with a “T.”
I know it’s cold and you warm-blooded, furless, pansies are sensitive, but is it too much to ask for someone to say, “I’m SO excited for Winter!”
Joe won’t end gas stations sometimes having bathrooms but sometimes definitely not, with no discernable reason why.
You must create a class that can be started online, moved to in-person, then back online, all simultaneously. You have the weekend to figure it out.