Which is More Fake, Soccer Injuries or Porno Orgasms?
Imagine how stupid you would look if you fell on the ground flailing and crying, accusing a guy 20 meters away from you of foul play. The same goes for sex.
Tag: Observations
The Newlywed Game: Taking Inventory
<p>In the obligatory pre-marital counseling, a couple learns about what they will fight over once the deed is done. The list really comes as no surprise to anyone, but is still worth noting. Being halfway through year one, I figured this was a good time to see how we are stacking up.</p><p><strong><font size="4">1. Money</font></strong></p>
The Merits of a Good Wingman
They're hard to find, quality wingmen. Despite this, you're probably expecting too much from them. A wingman's mission isn't to get you laid; that's your job.
A Girl’s Breast Friends
Ladies, in just a few short paragraphs, you will learn the tools necessary for utilizing your boobs to enhance every aspect of your life.
Gatorade: The Blood, Sweat, Etc. of America
There are only four types of people who drink Gatorade. Half are douchebags, half are athletes, and the rest are just really, really fucking thirsty.
Liars, and Tigers, and Whores, OH MY!
I have a confession to make: I, too, slept with Tiger Woods. What are we up to now, 13 mistresses? Is anyone counting anymore?
Explaining Wawa, The Amazing Little Sub Shop
Where I come from back in the Northeast there is a chain of amazing little sub shops called Wawa. Explaining what it is can be a difficult conversation.
Just Because It’s on the Internet Doesn’t Mean It’s Not Illegal
People do things on the internet that they normally wouldn't do in reality. Some of these things are illegal. But we get away with it, so whateva.
Chick-Rizzle McLovin’: The Importance of Going Down on Your Girl
As excited as guys get about blowjobs, they somehow forget that girls like oral too. So, guys, please stay tuned for this very important PSA.
To the Apathetic Asshole Who Cut My Hair
I know you are miserable in this job, and I know you get what you pay for, but if I shell out $13, I expect a halfway decent haircut.
Fat Chick Syndrome
Handling FCS sufferers (also known as Big Bitch Syndrome) requires one of two things: great patience or a chubby-chasing friend.
I Pledge Allegiance, To the NRA
A tough look at what inspires such a blind allegiance to the NRA, a group that should really be better at seeing straight.