I’m the Guy Your Uber Drivers Talk to Late at Night
Who could have thought, “Hey, it’s 2:15 AM, time to catch up with Slobodan!” You better believe that’s me on the other end. Every time.
Tag: Office
White Male Startup Seeking Diverse Board Member for IPO
Whatever kind of minority you are, it would be helpful if you could be very visible about your minority status, at least in company photos.
Uh Oh, We Hired an Actual Rock Star for Our Social Media Position
And though he was quite charming over the phone, in-person it was hard not to focus on his exceptionally poor oral hygiene.
I’m the Ugly Sculpture Outside Your Office Building
I know you don’t get me, but there was once a time when people just like you would walk past and think, “Wow. That’s one heck of a sculpture."
Is No One Going to Mention That Harry Has Cloned Himself?
We must answer the question of how Harry, a man I once saw eat a Skittle off the men’s room floor, conquered the forbidden frontiers of science.
Memo Regarding My Employment at Guilt-Centric Religion of My Childhood, Inc.
Unfortunately, I can no longer continue in my role as Associate Proselytizer, as I disagree with many of the Company's policies and decisions.
We Can’t Open Until Someone Comes Up with a Bon Mot for the Sidewalk Chalkboard
If we don’t come up with an ingenious sign, no one will ever come in, meaning no one will share post shots of our killer foam art.
When Children Try to Write Adult Fiction
"What is your job?" Wilmott said. "I work in an office," said Gorge. "My boss keeps turtles in a tank. Sometimes I have to feed them."
Just Because We Spotted Each Other at a Sex Party Doesn’t Mean I Can’t Still Be Your Accountant
Maybe you’re freaked out to think of accountants as sexual creatures. You want us always hunched over ledgers, never over your sweet, pliable body.
I’m the Tennis Ball Attached to an Old Man’s Walker
At the very least, I thought I’d live out my days being volleyed over some net in a park by people who considered themselves moderate exercisers.
It’s Hard Being a Barbarian Hero in Downtown Manhattan
“Your plight reached me on LinkedIn: the posting spoke of your lamentation, of your need for a Client Data and Management Information Co-Ordinator!”
The Simple and Effective No Cookies or Wine Diet
The only exception to the wine rule is for post-work networking drinks. You don’t want to make the other person feel bad about drinking wine!