Office | Page 24 | Points in Case

Tag: Office

I can’t get any sleep. Everywhere I go in my apartment the ghost follows me and keeps saying, “Remember the part…” and “What about when…”

How did I make this unexpected transformation from amateur writer to entrepreneur-scholar-travel blogger-Harlem Globetrotter?

"You fielded eighteen promposals before February. That's a county record."

Your mom; Dude you haven't seen since elementary school---didn’t he go to jail?; Memorial account for your deceased friend.

Someone might say, “Never have I ever abandoned families at a bus station right before a hurricane!” and you would drink since you've done that.

I plan to do great work today. Just as soon as I...check Instagram to see if that guy posted more dumb pictures of that thing he thinks is cool.

The people of Texas have disappointed millions of people who wanted their fates sealed by a hot guy for once.

These events are particularly disturbing given that we do not know Gritty's political party, nor is he a resident of the state of Texas.

Stuck to your cubicle wall with a push-pin that matches the color of “your party”: You work in middle-management but your team likes you, you think.

My advice is to ask her about her Fitbit as soon as possible, and then to make it a daily routine to inquire about her step count.

Find a project, be passionate about it, let it consume you until you have no time or energy for sex with your wife.

Don't dwell on your decision to crush that hitchhiker’s skull after listening to your partner suck lettuce from their molar for the last seven exits.