My Novel Packs a Ton of Crucial Backstory About the Protagonist’s Mother Into a Scene Where He Buys Chewing Gum
Hank nodded and muttered the word to himself: “Okay.” It was the same word Mama had used months before it happened...
Tag: Parents
Son, I Don’t Care What You Want, I’m Playing Guitar at Your Wedding
Speaking of, I’ve been thinking about playing some Allman Brothers at the rehearsal dinner. But I might need a little lead time to learn the solo.
Am I the Asshole for Giving My Daughter a Haircut?
Jump to conclusions why don’t you? I did not lock her in a basement. I’m not a monster. We live in a tower.
Excerpts from “Caring for Your Epilogue Baby”
Because the romance author who wrote your story didn’t quite know how to end their book.
Best Picture Reviews by Me, the Dad of a Six-Week-Old
Conclave: Based on the summary that my childless friend gave while dropping off a tray of lasagna, I found this story unnecessarily hard to follow.
Relaxing Vacation Spots for Moms
Buckle in for the getaway of your dreams. A luxurious solo spin in your very own 2009 Honda Civic.
Fatherhood Is Great, but I Think Being a Lifeguard in 1997 Was Actually the Best Job I Ever Had
In those days, the money and pool snacks seemed to flow as freely as the hose we used to spray down the concrete when some kid dropped his nachos.
How to Impress People as a Dad
Stimulate Your Baby’s Senses: But avoid actual stimulants, like coffee and Red Bull.
You Thought I Was Just Some Dad, Until I Did One Bad Pull-Up on These Monkey Bars
Now you’re thinking, “Wait, is that kid’s sexy childless uncle visiting from somewhere cool like Denmark?”
Dispatches from My Dad’s Visit to a Civil War Battlefield
Just glancing at this green expanse makes me burst with joy. It is the same feeling I had on my wedding day, and on the day you were born.
A List of Excuses to Use If You’re a Rich Parent with a Badly Behaved Child
You think my child is a heinous sociopath because she killed your family cat? Ever heard of formaldehyde and Damien Hirst? It's called art.
Parents, Just Fill Up the Volunteer Sign-Up Sheets and There Won’t Be Any Problems
You’re always baking anyway, what's one more batch of brownies? What about 12 extra batches?