Parents | Page 22 | Points in Case

Tag: Parents

There were so many things I wanted to tell you while I was twelve, and now I’m thirteen and don’t have the balls---I’m all sweaty pits and dry mouth.

Explain that "Interpretive Trail Hiking" won’t have a steady paycheck and encourage your boots to instead major in "Pre-Backpacking" at Bootiversity.

Don't ask loudly and rhetorically "See why I divorced her?" of the shoppers gaping at your unholy hissyfit over her congenital tardiness.

How would you rate the attitude of our management team? Overall did they seem motivated and alert?

Jimmy Silverman (Jimmy’s Room): Was anybody in my room the other night? I heard strange noises coming from my closet and it smelled like bad eggs.

What’s the point of locating a family to scare and waiting under a bed, if when I crawl out to scare the kid, they’re not even in there?

Dad’s old tennis sneakers: You dated him in college when he wore these sneakers and you seemed to like them just fine back then.

"Poll: Are you mad at me? Because your sister insinuated some things you might’ve told her about me…"

Ponder morbidly whether the great stuffed beasts of plains and forest were found dead or shot purely for taxidermic purposes.

Oh my god, I literally have nothing to put on my college applications. Why did you let me quit cross country?

Mabel has seen it all. She started in shapes, but quickly moved onto colors before being promoted to Creative Director within a year.

Someone wearing acid wash jeans or an acid wash denim mini skirt and a Tufts sweatshirt --- 20 points, Those Reeboks with the Velcro --- 25 points