Things White Men Are Tired of Hearing
Look: I’m white. I’m a man. My home and backyard are filled with dangerous worker bees that produce honey for me. It’s not that unusual.
Tag: Race
How to Pronounce the Names of White Male Politicians
Mike [ mahyk ] Pronounced: “my khh” Rhymes with: “yikes!” Common mispronunciations: Matt, Mark How to remember: Mike is short for “open mic night.”
How to Apologize for Your Racist Dog
How many of you have dogs who display selective aggression towards people of races other than your own? Everyone again. Frustrating, isn’t it?
A Prayer for the Trader Joe’s “Ethnic Lines” No Longer With Us
Let us sing the cleverest of songs for Trader Joe-San whose punny word play on the Japanese honorific translated to "Mr. Trader Joe."
I’m Your White Facebook Friend Who Never Left Their Hometown and I’m Here to Teach You about Conspiracy Theories
Did you know that Bill Gates actually invented racism? It’s something he put in all the vaccines. ALL OF THEM. But no, you probably don’t want to hear that.
John McClane’s Recent Thoughts on Defunding the Police
Do you know what you get for being a “hero”? Nothin'. So you might as well find a job that doesn't involve terrorizing low-income communities.
The Difference Between the Meanings of Ethnic Names and White Names
Farvardin: One who protects the good and the pure / Wendy: Says "I love you" way too frivolously
Reality Competition Shows for Complete Psychopaths
Project Runaway Train: Designers are placed on trains careening toward the edge of a cliff at groundbreaking speed.
Grown World: An Amusement Park for Adults
No Driver's License Bumper Cars: Like bumper cars, but only the child drives. You have to sit and incessantly pumping the imaginary brakes.
FAQ for Newly Hired CEOs Still Learning to Be Assholes
Should I comment on my employees' ethnicity? We recommend a "don't ask don't tell" policy. Everyone should be white in your eyes.
Guidelines for Hot, White Male Protagonists in Made-For-TV Holiday Movies
Flaky GPS will accidentally lead him to shithole town’s all too familiar old bar, where he'll bump into the one that got away.
Could You Make This Novel a Bit Blacker?
Instead of Jerrick Glitterblade, how about Jamal Kingston? A little regional flavor would add specificity to his character.