Relationships | Page 15 | Points in Case

Tag: Relationships

Be too into board games, James / Finally say how you really feel, Neil / Act like a slob, Rob / Cut them out of the will, Bill

Human Remains – Whoops! You’ve been living your best life for a few months and completely forgot about your boyfriend Carson in the fridge.

Looking like the way a six-year-old might try to draw a sports car? Quirky! The sound system that consisted of maybe two buttons total? Great

Q: Why did the lizard’s wife leave him? A: He had e-reptile dysfunction / Q: Why did Karen cross the street? A: To sleep with her boss

Just yesterday, Sabrina summoned me. “Jesus!” she exclaimed. It sounded important so I flew over, only to find her reading the news on her phone.

I like sex so much, I’ll have it anywhere: a king-sized bed, a queen-sized bed, I’ll even sex on a twin as long as I’m getting punished with sex.

I’m interested in analyzing the importance of “opening up” via “crying” and how this plays into our fantasies of ideal womanhood.

Some evil Freudian wiring has kept my sister and I at the mercy of the same celebrities and, even worse, absolute hunks in our daily lives.

I first had to ask for money after I blew most of our family’s inheritance on boat trips with Kylie Jenner’s second cousin.

Note my proper use of “whom.” “Whom” is also my safe word.

It’s a bridesmaid-eat-bridesmaid world. / Treat your friends like family and your family like bridesmaids. / Hate the bride, not the bridesmaid.

She thinks I forgot what park it was! We walked by it two months ago and she said “Look! Do you remember?” and I said “What?"