Now That We’ve Broken Up, You Should Get Tested
Dear Katie, I'm writing to tell you to get tested. It seems I've caught something, and not in a fun way, like that time we went fishing at your parent's lake house.
Tag: Relationships
The 18-Year-Old Virgin
It's not that I DON'T want to have sex, and it's not that I DO want to have sex, it's that I simply don't give a fuck about getting fucked. And yet I feel like I should.
How Guys Flirt with Girls on Social Media
A man's guide to navigating the murky waters of liking, poking, chatting, texting, calling, and friending in order to procure a non-random second interaction.
The 10 Rules to Successfully Cheating on Your Girlfriend
You're not really a cheater, you just have too much sex to give. Here are the tools you need for getting some on the side, without your girlfriend finding out.
Speed Dating: The Fast Track to Disappointment
At 30, single, tired of the vapidity of most day-to-day women, being an intellectual who smokes pipes, I reluctantly accepted a friend’s suggestion to try speed-dating.
The Relationship Compatibility Quiz You Won’t Find in Cosmo
Feel free to apply this simple questionnaire to your own relationship—unless of course you're already married and aren't in the mood for bad news.
19 Famous Poets Teach You How to Get Laid
Poetry is the lazy writer's way to express oneself. No wonder it's the perfect starter kit to get you laid! Prepare to be lauded as a genius, both in and out of bed.
Advanced Relationship Advice with Uncle Jeff
I think you're underestimating how important a layer of mystery is in maintaining sexual seduction in a relationship. No guy should ever know what a tampon is.
How Technology is Ruining Your Relationship
It's almost impossible to have a proper relationship anymore, thanks to technological advancements. If you're in a relationship you may want to look away now.
Why You Shouldn’t Fret That Your Boyfriend Grew a Beard
Being hirsute shouldn't be considered gross! Face fros are beautiful! They show hard work and dedication! And tons of other girlfriend-friendly stuff!
The Consequences of Being Single in February
February makes us remember the range of cruelty and suffering that the world (and especially Americans) put a certain minority through. Cheer up, single people.
Nice Guys Don’t Finish Last, They Win
I have designed the following six guidelines in order to assist nice guys in their quest for happiness and love. It's simple: first let your heart die, then play the game.