What Elementary School Was Like in Each Decade
The 1960s: Students are now allowed to bring lunches with them to school.
Tag: School
Excerpts from the Harry Potter Series, Reprinted in the Trumpian Translation
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: This one’s about people from different backgrounds coming together to fight for a greater good. Skip!
Welcome to Your Guided Meditation for Creatives
Now that we’re well into our session, stop and rearrange your bookshelf. Go ahead. It’s like productive procrastination which is almost meditation.
My Car is Dead But My Soul is Alive
God, I haven't ridden a bike for years. Okay, that still works. Yes, I have thighs. Thick thighs. Strong thighs. Thunder God thighs.
Becca’s Baking Blog: This Banana Bread Will Fuck Your Shit Up
And before you ask, you disgusting skid mark, yes, we’re sifting our dry ingredients before combining. We weren’t raised by fucking mole people.
How I Failed at Being a Gilmore Girl
Thanks to my newly acquired need for a speed supplier, I finally found my bad-boy boyfriend. He also cooked meth on the side and almost blew me up once or twice while I was asleep.
Please Give Me Custody of the Foosball Table
Please, I'm begging you to let me hold those knobs in my hands. I want to hear the sound of that little soccer ball dropping onto the table.
“Mission: Impossible Fallout” Fails to Fully Capture My Experience of Life as a White Man
I’m worried about the young white boy who watches this movie and doesn’t realize there’s pleasure in riding a helicopter that doesn’t entail gunfire.
Want to Not Keep Score at This Game I’m Terrible At?
Let’s just relax and not keep score except in a silent and secretive manner that I will only publicize if I happen to be in the lead at hole 17.
What Did You Do This Summer?
You ran a marathon? Impressive! How was it? I bet. The first five are always the hardest, then you move on to Ironmans.
The Lamentations of Your Forgotten Love, The Cigarette
We grew together. We have history. Does vape know that you used to slobber too much in your tween years?
I Didn’t Spend Four Years at Juilliard Studying Percussion To Be Called “Mr. Tambourine Man”
"You'll come following me in the jingle jangle morning," will you? You're going to stalk me? Is that a threat?