Quotes from Teaching Your Parents Zoom, or HAL from “2001: A Space Odyssey”?
“I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.”
Tag: Science
The Six Differences between Andre the Giant and Louis Pasteur
Andre The Giant contributed significantly less to the collective knowledge of germ theory.
I Fear That, Due to Climate Change, There May Never Be Another 4/20/69
As everyone knows, 4/20/69 is the funniest possible date. After all, 420 is the weed thing and 69 is the sex thing. Imagine them... Combined!
Rejected Malcolm Gladwell Books
Shut Up: How Talking Makes It Harder to Communicate and Causes Large Fires / Dogs: They Were Puppies Once / Losers: The Real Winners, Who Lost
How to Tell if You’re Having Coronavirus Symptoms or Simple Ketamine Withdrawal
In these trying times, it may be harder than ever to tell exactly why you feel like total shit when you wake up in the morning.
It’s a Quarantine You Lazy Ass, Get to Work
Paint a Fresco - Sure the prep list is a bitch and wet lime plaster is a bear of a medium, but can you think of a better time to tackle the job?
Dispatches from the Media Relations Desk of the Terran Starship Expedient
We can reassure our Cres’Nan allies that incidences of uncontrolled mutation are unrelated to our activities and are probably completely coincidental.
Junk Drawers of History
Albert Einstein - Pencils. No erasers. News clippings explaining Relativity in wrong but hilariously wrong ways. Address book of actual relatives.
A Message to All Anti-Vaxxers from an Appreciative Resident in 2320
Measles, schmeasles... which is actually a new form of measles.
Space Force Wants You!
The lightweight uniforms of Space Force feature “Drip-Nip Technology©" that can resist water, whether it’s a splashdown or an unexpected “swirly."
Is No One Going to Mention That Harry Has Cloned Himself?
We must answer the question of how Harry, a man I once saw eat a Skittle off the men’s room floor, conquered the forbidden frontiers of science.
This Week’s Pub Trivia Theme Is My Unjust Firing as Quizmaster
You also get free points if you have advice on what to do when your beloved pet gets evicted from his favorite shelf in a seldom-used closet.