The Worst Sexual Encounter in My Fucking Life
A whiny hoe with a bloody vag leaves her mark on Gaudio, prompting him to disavow one night stands and *gasp* embrace monogamy.
Tag: Sex
The True Female Orgasm: A Story
Eating out doesn't have to be expensive, but if you wanna get the job done right, you might have to spring for a bullhorn and a diamond ring.
A Guide to Getting Girls to Kiss… EACH OTHER!
Seven steps to turn a regular party into a straight female slobberfest, including the sure-fire technique for inducing repeat girl-on-girl kissing.
The Art of Seduction
Matters of the heart may seem abstract, but with the right enthusiasm and passion, you'll be meeting your GOALs (Girl Offering Anal Love) in no time.
The Theory of the Unlandable Guy
There are a lot of hypotheses for the mystery of the failed hookup, but none with such extensive research in the field (of cannabis).
I Saw You Eye Fucking Me
It's not like you're wearing sunglasses you know. I can feel the heat from your eyes burning on me like a thousand suns. You want me so badly.
An Interview with a Regular Slut
As y'all may or may not know (doesn't matter), I love sluts. Especially really hot sluts. I'm all for women who want nothing more than sex all the time. In fact, for better or for worse, these are typically the kinds of chicks who find themselves attracted to me.
Trey Parker: Bigger, Longer & Uncut
Going down to South Park going to see if I can't... engage in sleazy ransacking, hot tub hookuping, 50-pound pussy sleeping, all in Trey Parker's house.
I’m Sorry I Fucked Your Wife
Okay, I'll admit screwing your wife in public was wrong, but completely emasculating you in the process, well, that was way out of line.
Platinum Pussy: It’s Everywhere You Want to Be!
Ladies, you've been pre-approved for everything you desire. Just learn to milk your man for every last drop that he's worth and it's truly priceless.
The Birds ‘n the Bees – Presentation Script
You've got to learn all about sex sometime, might as well be from the neighbor, right?
Suck My Cock, Bitch: The Airtight Argument
No matter the scenario, even if she's got a good head on her shoulders, if you whip out this argument, she'll soon be speechless.