Relaxation Techniques For When You’re Feeling Anxious or Looting a Radio Shack
Remain present as you haul ass down the aisles, reminding yourself to stay in the moment as you sweep armfuls of electronics into a burlap sack.
Tag: Tech
Idiot Humans Love When AI Jumbles Up Words
The human appeared to be leaking water from its eyes while reading “Baby this is your back,” “All of our umbrellas are so in love,” & “Lose Your Ya!”
5 Ballin’ Pieces of Job Search Advice Most Effective If You’re Tim Motherfucking Cook
Um, I don't know why anyone but Tim Cook is still reading this, but you should probably bottle up your excitement...
Five Airbnb Listings You Literally Need to Book Right Now
Hal's Review: "About 13,000 people died there in the early 1900s, but you could hardly tell!"
The Five Stages of Grief for an Unanswered Tinder Message
Depression: Did I go too far by putting a puppy on my lap as I hold a guitar? Sure, I don’t know how to play guitar, but she doesn’t know that.
I Am a Horse and You Can Totally Put the Cart Before Me If You Want
Although, speaking of our actual bodies, you should absolutely look a gift horse in the mouth. You can tell a horse's age by looking at its teeth.
What Elementary School Was Like in Each Decade
The 1960s: Students are now allowed to bring lunches with them to school.
Please Insert Your Chip Into the Card Reader
Please insert your chip into the card reader. Please please insert your card. Please please please. Please society. Please the machine. Chip card.
Woke Gear for the Politically Correct
New at Macy’s are Cordial-Roy® casual slacks---virtue you can wear. Looking good while avoiding social indiscretion never looked, well, so good!
English Lit Grads: Choose a Career in Tech Support
There are at least two sides to a story. The client will think their version is the only true story. Don’t waste time convincing them of the truth.
75 Years Since #MeToo: Men Have Never Had It Worse
Since #MeToo, most men have ceased screaming sexually explicit compliments from the open windows of their turbo-charged street shuttles.
I Read Your Guidelines, But I’m Submitting This Piece That Clearly Isn’t a Fit for Your Publication Because, Well, Just Read It and You’ll See Why
It's basically the best thing since Gravity's Rainbow. Think of it sort of as Infinite Jest but more like Pirates of the Caribbean and with robots.