How Technology is Ruining Your Relationship
It's almost impossible to have a proper relationship anymore, thanks to technological advancements. If you're in a relationship you may want to look away now.
Tag: Tech
Stop Posting About Your Kids on Facebook, Part 3
I've done my best this year to try and avoid the Facebook narcissism that endlessly infiltrates my news feed, only to find that it is physically impossible, thus Part 3.
20 Realistic Inspirational Quotes for Your Email Signature
Most of the emails you send on a daily basis contain absolutely no thoughts that could be considered "profound." So stop using ridiculously unrealistic inspirational quotes.
Ecce Homo Restoration Fail Now On Twitter “New Jesus”
New Jesus: I have been restored.
The Time I Accidentally Started a Religion Because Facebook Doesn’t Get Sarcasm
When asked to describe my religious beliefs when I first joined Facebook, I simply typed the sentence, "It involves spaceships and LSD." Now I'm the founding prophet.
The First Ever Honest Dating Profile
I will outline all the terrible attributes that make me a bad person and suggest the underlying psychological reasons why I am perpetually alone. This will save us time I promise.
Your Facebook Birthday Wishes Explained By Time Posted
It can often be difficult to figure out the true meaning behind people posting "happy birthday" on your wall. But by looking at the times of each post, you can dissect the situation.
The Seedy, Sexy Underbelly of Twitter
It was Christmas Eve on Twitter when I tweeted, "I drink Starbucks coffee because when you're single, you forget the taste of butthole." And I immediately attracted the attention of one man.
Match.com: Another Satisfied Customer
<p>I joined Match.com because I had no other options. My mail-order-bride, Sveta, found a legal loophole and was able to return to her native homeland of Russia, citing my "inability to perform," which is quite ridiculous because I majored in theater at Oxford School of Drama so like I don't even get what she's talking about.</p><p>Lewis Donahue. </p>
On the Mass Appeal of Nipples, Match.com, and Prostate Exams
Society subscribes to a weird set of rules, and how we interpret them is even weirder. For example, why is the nipple what censorship uses as the limit for upper-torso nudity?
iSorry, But Steve Jobs was a Dick
What Steve Jobs did was create an army of narcissistic, self-centered, self-absorbed, zombie clones by sucking their very souls into his world like Shang Tsung.
The Stages of Facebook Withdrawal
They say the first step to recovery is the admission of a problem. Well here it is, and here I am: I am addicted to Facebook. The following are the insurmountable consequences of trying to quit.