Dear Wikipedia Readers, We’ll Get Right to It: We Need Your Money
That should say “eight million." I guess you could pay somebody to fix it or—wait, we do that for free, all for the cost of a cup of coffee, don’t we?
Tag: Writing
Could You Make This Novel a Bit Blacker?
Instead of Jerrick Glitterblade, how about Jamal Kingston? A little regional flavor would add specificity to his character.
This Year’s Hottest Murder Mystery Party Theme: Who Killed Your Creativity
The invitations should allude to the theme of the evening. You could write your invitations on a spreadsheet from work, or some unpaid medical bills.
Excerpts from Dr. Frankenstein’s Lost Journal, 1790-1791
I remain perplexed as to the genesis of Igor’s strong opinions regarding the choice of which cadaver shall provide the penis.
Review Your Monkey’s Paw Order on Amazon
"I got this weird monkey’s paw from some dude hanging outside of Port Authority. I was trying to buy weed and he said he had something stronger? Lol"
An Introduction to the Major Laws of Freelancer Physics
First Law of Freelancer Motion: A freelancer at rest will stay at rest unless that state is changed by an impending deadline.
New York Times Restaurant Review: Big Terry’s Truck
The atmosphere of Big Terry’s truck was rustic Americana at its finest, from the American Flag seat covers to the Springsteen on the radio.
I’m Sam Spade, Professional Book Blurber
“It’s been a long time since I burst into tears because a publishing house didn’t get its jacket copy before deadline.”
Personal Notes Found in the Vents of a Secondhand Pair of Medium Wash Ripped Skinny Moto Jeans
Smoke salvia out of sister's vacuum cleaner. Land a kickflip in the middle of the woods with nobody around, next to a fallen tree.
Ken Cuccinelli Rejects “The New Colossus”
“And her name, Mother of Exiles” --- Where did you get this name from? The current working title of the statue is “Water Hello Person.”
Exercise Tips from Literature and Mythology
“But what on earth are you doing?” cried the vexed Rapunzel. “Why, developing and toning my bipeds and quadrilaterals, of course.”
The 10 Best Humor Websites You’ve Never Heard Of
The Naughty Muffin - Risqué humor focused on baked goods. Sample posts: "Oh my, you ARE all buttery today, aren’t you?"