Fee-Fi-Fo-Fum, Will You Give My “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt” Spec a Read?
You’re talking to the guy who read a few passages from Aristotle’s “Poetics,” but also read the Wikipedia summary several times.
Tag: Writing
How I Failed at Being a Gilmore Girl
Thanks to my newly acquired need for a speed supplier, I finally found my bad-boy boyfriend. He also cooked meth on the side and almost blew me up once or twice while I was asleep.
Don’t Blame Me, Blame the Stars!
I mean who hasn’t punched their roommate’s mother because Saturn was in Cancer? I'm not sure how else anyone would have expected me to act.
I Read Your Guidelines, But I’m Submitting This Piece That Clearly Isn’t a Fit for Your Publication Because, Well, Just Read It and You’ll See Why
It's basically the best thing since Gravity's Rainbow. Think of it sort of as Infinite Jest but more like Pirates of the Caribbean and with robots.
Writer’s Block Busted! Political Speechwriters Edition
The first step, of course, is to avoid mirrors. This is essential if you are to eliminate the risk of looking yourself in the eye.
Everything I Have Fantasized About Doing If I Ever Finish “Infinite Jest”
15. Regretting having wasted time and energy on what was pretty much what you would expect a 1,079-page novel written by a white guy in 1996 to be.
Thank You for Rescuing Me From This Trash Can I’ve Stuffed Myself Into to Write a Novel
Imagine a book written entirely in uncomfortable places with completely unconventional materials. Genius, isn’t it?
What Your Zodiac Sign Says About Your Cheese Compatibility
Sagittarius: Relishes in cheeses collected from their travels around the world
Your Submission “My Thoughts on Politics” Has Been Declined
In conclusion, communism doesn’t work in practice, please don’t hurt my family, keep it under 1,000 words.
Preparing Your Obituary
Give them a single tantalizing tidbit such as, “Bernice had many secrets, one of which involved a prominent member of Congress from Wisconsin."
The Complete “Skeleton” Film Franchise
Skeleton: Awakening (Note on the musical score) “I don’t think the nipples would change the xylophone tone in that way.”
God Tries to Figure Out the Plot Holes in the Bible
[God's pen is paused above the passage where Noah gets all fat and is lying drunk in a tent after surviving the flood.] ANGEL: Water balloon fight?