1. The Kid Who Flipped His Eyelids Inside Out
Catchphrase: “Dude, I think the teacher hates me!”
Arrest Record: Violating parole, third-degree murder, probably doing something fucked up to animals
Common Names: Jared, Dory, Matthew (and would get very upset if you called him Matt)
2. The Girl Who Would Tan So The Playboy Bunny Symbol Was Outlined On Her Pelvic Bone
Catchphrase: “Joey wants to try anal again.”
Arrest Record: Solicitation, neglecting their kids, shoplifting
Common Names: Jessica, Kira, Tiffany
3. The Boy Who Would Pull His Balls Out
Catchphrase: “Wanna see something cool?”
Arrest Record: Indecent exposure
Common Names: Scotty, Stevie, Sammy
4. The Kid Whose Dad Was A Cop
Catchphrase: “I can do whatever the fuck I want.”
Arrest Record: Disorderly conduct, public intoxication
Common Names: Cory, Brooks, Craig
5. The Girl Who Had A Boyfriend Who Didn’t Graduate About 4 Years Ago But Showed Up To Prom With A Top Hat And Fake Diamond Earrings And Tried To Start A Fight With A Teacher They Used To Have
Catchphrase: “He loves me.”
Arrest Record: Leaving their baby in the car, yelling at her boyfriend loud enough for the cops to get called, meth lab
Common Names: Tessa, Landis, Randa
6. The Boy That Utilized Rubber Bands Solely To Hurt People
Catchphrase: “I didn’t know it would hurt him!”
Arrest Record: Attempting to build a bomb, illegally carrying guns because it shouldn’t “violate their ‘Consi-suess-eh-nul’ rights”
Common Names: Blake, John, Zach
7. The Kid Who Would Ruin Lunch by Playing With Their Food And Pouring Milk Onto Their Plate
Catchphrase: “What, are you grossed out?”
Arrest Record: Serial killer
Common Names: Brett, Chris, Dustin
8. The Girl That Was Super Religious But Also Racist
Catchphrase: “I don’t think Muslim people can get into Heaven.”
Arrest Record: Harassment, fraud
Common Names: Faith, Grace, Harmony
9. The Boy With Flame Decals On His Car
Catchphrase: “I’m gonna do spins in the Walmart parking lot.”
Arrest Record: Trying to do some Tokyo Drift shit, drunk driving
Common Names: Mason, Tyler, or would just go by his last name
10. The Kid That Would Carve Something Onto Themselves And Call It a Tattoo
Catchphrase: “You want one?”
Arrest Record: Loving too much
Common Names: Derrick, Coco, a nickname no one understood
11. The Girl Who Wore Pajama Pants Every Day That Smelled Like Weed
Catchphrase: “I need to go to the bathroom, it’s important.”
Arrest Record: Drug paraphernalia, drug possession, something they swear they didn’t do and started crying when they got arrested before yelling at the cop
Common Names: Taryn, Eryn, Lauryn
12. The Boy Who Wore JNCO Jeans And Did Backyard Wrestling
Catchphrase: “Y’all wanna hear this Mudvayne CD I burnt?”
Arrest Record: Arson
Common Names: Robert, Ben, James
13. The Kid That Pretended Fun Dip Was Cocaine
Catchphrase: “What do you mean you’re still a virgin? We’re 13! Sniff my fingers.”
Arrest Record: Oh, definitely real cocaine
Common Names: Skyler, Dana, Jonah
14. The Girl That Got Into A Fight at Like 7:30 AM When Everyone Was In the Gym Chilling Before Classes Started
Catchphrase: “Oh that bitch just gonna show up to school like she wasn’t talking shit this weekend?! Hold my McMuffin!”
Arrest Record: Attempted murder, fighting in a parking lot, stabbing her boyfriend
Common Names: Brittney, Brittani, Brittany
15. The Boy Named Tommy
Catchphrase: “Hi, I’m Tommy.”
Arrest Record: Unspeakable Tommy-like actions.
Common Names: Thomas, Tom, Kevin