The next person to invite me to that fucking cocksucking zombie/vampire application will be shot on sight. Any person to invite me to that homosexual bullshit application thereafter will also be shot.
I want to make this clear: I'm not kidding. I will shoot you in the fucking throat and you will die. You will not come back to life. You will be dead.
Why?
Firstly, because you are not a zombie and you are not a vampire. Quite the contrary, you are a fucking nerd. Which nerds, ironically like zombies, also need a life. So please, if you value watching Star Trek, reading Ann Rice or masturbating as a substitute for sex with a girl, do not think of me when requesting me to add the application.
I have honestly already heard of it. I'm quite fucking internet savvy.
Also, not that I give a fuck, but isn't the only way you can send one of those things is by “biting” me?
Yeah. Fag. That's what I thought.
Secondly,I will kill you because I do not need my inbox being filled up with 15 fucking notifications a day from that utter bullshit.
So stop, or as I said before, I will shoot you.
I really can't stress this enough.
I am literally going to end your life.
That is to say, I am not going to make a Facebook application that somehow hunts you down and figuratively kills your “character.” No. Your “character” just won't be updated because you won't have access to Facebook.
Why? Because real-life corpses can't click a mouse. They can only rot and not flood my inbox with retarded shit. Which makes me happy.
And before I go, I'd like to say: You're all losers and I'm ashamed to even call you my facebook friends.
Thanks in advance,
Gaudio