Y'all are probably sick of hearing about this alleged book of mine that is allegedly hilarious and allegedly finished, but I figure I owe you an update, anyway.
I have given up on agents and publishing companies, none of whom have shown any interest in my book because it's not classifiable (whatever the fuck that means) and have elected to self publish as a result. The closest I came to getting any representative of a publishing company interested in my book was when a Putnam Press rep referred to my book as “a memoir on acid.” And since “a memoir on acid” sounds like a description of something awesome, I figured he'd be all for publishing it.
But he wasn't.
So anyway, I got on Lulu.com and was ready to self-publish when I realized that I needed a cover page. Court Sullivan and I exchanged emails about this and I learned two things about my fearless editor: he has a great sense of imagery and he thinks I can operate a computer with some semblance of success.
Long story short, my sister, Tiffany is working on designing a cover for the book. When she finishes it, I will publish it. Until then, we'll all just have to continue doing what we're doing.
And, since I'm counting this as my Thursday post, I figure I'll tell y'all a little story about how I chose my sister for this task.
I had not spoken to my sister since her birthday last February. My sister is one of those girls that just, well, ain't much for correspondence. And that's fine. We rarely have anything that we need to say to each other.
So, you can imagine my surprise when I finished my game last night to discover that she had called me not once, not twice, but three times.
“What could be so important that my sister had to call me three times in a day?” I asked my friend, Kris. “I mean, I'm lucky to get three calls a year from her.”
“Dude, you have a sister?” he replied.
I checked the message she left, and it turned out that she had called me because she forgot the name of the Titan in Greek mythology who was forced to spend eternity pushing a boulder up a hill.
Fucking Sisyphus.
My sister called me because of Sisyphus.
But all in all it was a good thing that she called because I remembered that she has a degree in graphic design.
Anyway, if the book doesn't come out in April, it'll be out in May.
Thanks for your patience. And I promise that “The Snippets and the Impure Tour” will totally be worth the wait.