Hey gang, it's audience participation time! You get to answer my questions with stories and anecdotes. Fill in the comment box and tell me your deepest, darkest, chocolate-y secrets.
1. Easter is coming up on Sunday, which means…Jelly Beans! I won't lie, I'm a sucker for Easter candy. I'll argue that chocolate-covered marshmallow eggs, Peeps, jelly beans, Robin Eggs (Whoppers) and chocolate bunnies are the best holiday candy there is. I dare you to disagree with me. What do you like more? Candy corns? C'mon. Candy canes? Mint candy, it's like brushing your teeth. Candy hearts? They're like eating chalk with annoying messages written on them. What's your favorite holiday candy?
2A. I picked up a collection of H.P. Lovecraft stories the other day, and it's literally the first book since college that I've put down and swore to never read again. What's the worst book you've ever tried to read? 2B. What's your favorite book that you can't recommend enough?
Obligatory Sex Question (sort of): 3. When are you and your significant other officially in a relationship? After your first bang? When you have toothbrushes at each other's places? Meeting the parents?
Obligatory Sex Question: 4. Sometimes you get that moment of clarity and you realize your potential hookup mate is fat, stupid or way too skanky. Tell about a time and reason you cut yourself off from getting laid. Or maybe you were cut off. Explain.