(If you look closely, The Ninja Turtle-looking guy or King Of Death is punching me so hard my eyeballs are coming out.)
So the North Koreans are acting like, well, North Koreans. But that hasn't stopped my darling little students from smiling, laughing and learning. And calling me names. Here are a few gems as of late:
LEO: (Korean) @#$&%.
KC: What's that mean?
LEO: Um. You're very handsome.
KC: Oh thanks. Pinchemadre. Chico de Diablo. (Spanish for, motherfucker devil child).
LEO: What's that mean?
KC: You're very handsome and smart.
TOM: Oh teacher, I go to hell. I have good news and bad news.
KC: Why?
TOM: This is my last day at this school. The teachers, like you, are so handsome and kind.
KC: Okay. I'm sorry to hear that. What's the good news?
TOM: I have Starcraft 2 now. It is amazing.
KC: You know, when Tom leaves, my self esteem is going to fall through the floor.
ZACH TEACHER: Why?
KC: He always calls me handsome and kind and cool and nice. He's great.
ZACH TEACHER: All he does is draw dragons in class though.
KC: And how about you Ben? Did you like Swiss Family Robinson?
BEN: Fuck off.
KC: Whoa. Where did you learn that kind of language? That's not the kind of language we use in my class.
BEN: You taught me.
KC: I have never said, um, those words.
BEN: In the teacher lounge.
KC: Ah, frack.
JAEMIN: We don't call it "Koy-Boy-ee-Bo" (Paper Rock Scissors) any more. We call it "KC-Boy-ee-Bo."
KC: Uh. Why?
JAEMIN: Because when you are mad you always raise the hand and make a rock.
(After repeated warnings, Chipmunk leans his chair too far back and falls over hitting his head. KC runs over there.)
KC: Are you okay?
CHIPMUNK: Yes…Why is your face red?
KC: Because I'm worried about you.
CHIPMUNK: I thought you were going to hit me.
KC: Well, I was thinking about it.
LEO: Do you kiss your girlfriend?
KC: Since it's recess and it's just you and me. I've known my girlfriend a long time and sometimes give my girlfriend a little peck.
LEO: What's a peck?
KC: Pretend this is my girlfriend's mouth (holding up his fingers shaped kind of like a person's lips. KC gives the hands an innocent fake lips.)
LEO: Um.
KC: When you get older, you'll understand. Now go play.
LEO: KC TEACHER'S GIRLFRIEND IS HIS HAND!!!