In our Current voting:
3 for titties
4 for ass
two indecisive guys
one Three Six Mafia song
one dude with unrealistic expectations
a juggs comment
your mom's comment
a vagina lover
and finally, one vote for eyes.
Of course, I love all of them equally.
However, I should say that the final vote I mentioned angers me a bit.
Here's why:
It's been my experience that guys who say “eyes make a girl sexy” don't actually think that eyes are the crux of making a woman attractive. I mean, you have to have pretty low standards if you're going to look at the world's fattest bitch and say, “Shake that iris bitch lemme see what ya got, now shake that iris BITCH lemme see what ya got…” or “Girl, gimme dat gimme dat ret'na!” or “Optic nerve.”
I mean personally, I have never, ever, ever, EVER gotten a boner from looking into a girl's eyes or looking at a girl's eyes. Nor will I ever get a boner because of eyes. Come to think of it, I bet that no guy in the world has gotten a boner from staring into the eyes of a fat, titless, legless whore. Is it because they don't have pretty eyes? That certainly can't be the case. One of them has to have pretty eyes.
I'll admit that eyes do add to sexiness, because we all can admit that if a girl gives you that “FUCK ME” look…well, then it's all over. But, you just can't fucking assert that eyes make a girl sexy. Or, I should say, that you can't say that and actually be a man.
So, to the woman who put that in the voting, I'd like you to stop coming to my blog. I have rules for a reason, whore.
And if you are indeed a dude….well…I just want you to realize that most men think that guys who say that eyes are the sexiest part of a woman's body are big pussies who are only trying to be sweet and emo. I agree with this sentiment and go one step further: I believe that you should be shot in the pecker.
So yeah…seriously…quit with the fucking act and just admit it, you'd never jerk off to a set of baby blues, but you WOULD to a nice firm pair of pants-hams.
Speaking of pants-hams, I'm off to go glaze some now.
Yum.
P.S. Keep the votes coming, everybody. Just no more eyes shit.