A few days ago, I met a guy named Orlando at a bar and he said the strangest thing to me. After bullshitting with him for about fifteen minutes he said, “You know, you're an easy guy to relate to. You should be a standup comedian or a writer.”
I told him that I am (sort of) a writer and that I was considering trying standup comedy but that I don't really think I'm an easy guy to relate to.
He differed on the subject. And fortunately for me, he didn't beg to do so. In fact, he replied, “Man, I'm a Puerto Rican from Hartford who never went to college. I got a wife and a kid and I'm fifteen years older than you and I had no trouble relating to you. You got that ‘every man' thing about you. You know, I don't think there's a barbecue in the world you could have a bad time in.”
“Well,” I replied. “Barbecue's good.”
Yesterday, one of my clients told me that I was easy to relate to. I asked her what she meant. She said, “You express yourself with an interesting combination of compassion and logic that actually comes out as pretty funny, even though I don't think you know how funny it is.”
I thanked her and didn't explore the issue any further because my meetings with my clients are not about me (as much as I would like them to be) and are actually about my clients. So I switched the subject over to her, finished the meeting, went home, got drunk and passed out.
And when I woke up, I got to attend one of those corporate sponsored meetings where new products get revealed and I had plenty of time to think about what the hell it actually means to relate to someone.
I mean, what does that even mean?
I came to the conclusion that relating to people essentially means sharing similar experiences and emotions and conveying those. But that can't be why I relate to people (if I really do) because if people truly shared the kind of experiences and emotions I'm prone to, this would be a very, very strange world. I mean, stranger than it is right now. Which, really and truly, is kind of fucked up, but I digress again.
So, if relating to people has little to do with sharing their experiences, then it must have to do with understanding and conveying the entire human experience. Which can't be that difficult to do because the human experience basically consists of living and dying. One I know a lot about, the other I know a lot less (but I think the same can be said for everyone, even necrophiliacs).
After careful consideration, I realized that I have no idea why, how or if I relate to people. And that got me thinking that I spend a lot of time thinking about myself.
And then I found out that Saturday night, North Tampa lost a great guy when Dan Pope passed away. And for a few fleeting moments, I forgot about myself and remembered him.
My condolences to Pope's friends and family, and everyone who knew him around here. Services will be held at 3PM in the afternoon this Saturday. In a bar. The way Pope would have wanted it.
We'll miss you, brother.