After a night of heavy drinking, a guy and a girl come back to the guy's apartment. He is about to stick it in when…

Girl: “Wait…who's that?”

The camera cuts over to the other side of the room, where approximately 500 people are standing. A helicopter can now be heard that somehow couldn't be heard before, along with the noise 500 people would make, that also couldn't be heard before.

Guy: “Oh…that's just my network.”

Girl: “I'm not gonna have sex in front of them!”

Guy: “God damn it.” He looks over at the Verizon guy, who rolls his eyes and appears overall condescending. “What?! What the fuck are you looking at? And why did you just roll your eyes?! You think you're better than me? You may lead a network of millions around so the ability to share conversation, texts, pictures, video, and data with any of them is lightning-quick but YOU DO NOT OWN ME!”

He looks back at the girl.

“He used to always keep saying ‘can you hear me now?' That was the most annoying thing ever. Thank God he stopped doing that. Now he just reacts to slightly comedic situations with an eye-roll, a condescending facial expression, and a fake embarrassed “just pretend I'm not here” look on his face. He is the Devil incarnate. Let's just ignore him, babe.”

Girl: “No, I'm leaving.”

The girl leaves and the guy is stuck lying in bed naked with hundreds of people staring at him.

Labels:

Related

Resources