Not So Deadly Sins

Sometimes I wonder about the little sins—the ones that don’t fall into the “seven deadly” category but are still impolite and somewhat dastardly, like farting in church or drinking in class. And sometimes, when I wonder, I write about what I wonder about. Sometimes I even make lists. And this one time, I made a list of the seven little, not-so-deadly sins. (All thanks to Bunni for sparking this post with her brilliant suggestion.)

Farting
Unless it’s just you and the guys, this is just generally frowned upon. Nevertheless, people fart on each other all the time. People fart in elevators, in churches, in beds and in the faces of the women they love. It’s a natural bodily function. And it’s wrong to do in public, but not quite as wrong as taking a crap.

Crapping
Think about it. You take one crap on a hotel lobby floor and you’re branded for life. You’d have thought you crapped on an infant’s head the way those people, um, probably reacted or something.

Taking the Last Beer
Come on, dude. At least announce that you’re taking it. It’s the last beer.

(I’d like to point out that right after I typed that sentence I got up and grabbed a beer. And no, I’m not seeking help. Yet.)

Saying ‘Conversate’
It’s not a word. Please, please, please, please, please stop. I’m begging you. Please.

Getting Political
If you’re not running for something, shut up. And yes, I’m guilty of this one, as well as of all of these, with the exception of saying ‘conversate.’ Man, I hate that.

Story Matching
Even if your story is true, one-upping your friends is never cool. Which sucks, because their stories are usually lame.

Ending a List with a Bad Joke
What can I say? We all do it, right?