I was listening to Backstreet Boys' earlier material DON'T JUDGE ME and I realized that they talk a lot about "love" and "giving it" and "to the girl" and "not living without said girl" and "not caring about anything but said girl" like, not even her back story and history? Whoa, whoa there "boys," let's get something straight: If I were to show any interest in any girl of ever, Vernon over here better get some words out of this girl about her family, where she's from, siblings, etc. These dudes would date fugitive killers as long as "they love them (the Backstreet Boys)." Does that sound not right to anyone else in this boardroom? I mean, good Lord, guys. Is it really that slim pickings out there. For you guys? Multi-million dollar recording artists? If that is the case, then I'm in some SERIOUS trouble.
Also, I was watching the music video for "Quit Playin' Games With My Heart" DON'T JUDGE ME and I noticed the following:
- Raining outside at night
- They are all dancing
- No shirts/chests exposed
- Except for the minor (at that time) Nick Carter (shirt buttoned)
- LOTS of gyration and chest rubbing
And to this I say: Okay, Backstreet Boys, you're dancing, I can understand that. You have a lot of girls to impress, gotta show them what your working with. But, the problem I have with this certain scenario is that it was raining outside. Huh? Was there not a Rec Center nearby where they could have gone inside and danced? I live near a Rec Center and they offer dancing classes, take my word for it. Have I tried said dance classes? … That information is classified. I digress, it was raining out and they were dancing like it was a minor inconvenience and not a huge problem. THEY WERE DRENCHED. They probably smelled like worms. Gross.
On to the next point: No shirts/chests exposed. Right. No, I get it. I understand your reasoning for this. It was for the ladies and maybe one or two dudes but when you include point 5, I start to worry. So, to break it down, we've got: No shirts/chests exposed + LOTS of gyration and chest rubbing = Vernon vomiting up his nice microwaved dinner. It just looked SO weird I couldn't understand the reasoning for all of the sexual exploitation of these young, classy gentleman. It was a disgrace for any man who has ever danced while raining outside without a shirt on and rubbing his chest. Now, it's just outdated.
Furthermore, their song "I'll Never Break Your Heart" OKAY FINE JUDGE ME WHATEVER I DON'T EVEN CARE OKAY MAYBE A LITTLE. Each of the Backstreet Boys declared with the utmost sincerity that they will "never break their heart" and if so, "they'd rather die than be without them." Hmm. Okay. I feel you BSB. I've been in a couple relationships where it felt that if I didn't have this girl, I would "die." But I meant it figuratively, not literally. And that, I fear, is their downfall. If they say it so broadly then every girl will expect this and that is simply not true. There have been some girls that I could very much live without. For the better.
Okay, cool. This has been Vernon's Breakdown Of Backstreet Boys. Hope you enjoyed. Not really. I'd be surprised if any of you kept reading past the title.
I need to go to sleep.