I have a wireless keyboard. Sometimes I pretend it's a guitar and jam on it. The resulting text looks like
232elw[p1q;\[ew]]\3e[‘j1e4nw5o."!
\3e[‘j1e4nw5o."!
Which has to be the literary equivalent of rock n roll. Or at least punk.
Come on. You have to give me punk.
That's why I can forgive a lot of the stupid around me. Because I do stupid stuff like pretending my keyboard is a guitar and wailing.
35[4pl3=l5p=3oer3p;3-rt3ort3e5rt3
I'm not lying when I say that I'm stupid. And most who know me will agree that I just ain't the quickest sometimes.
Now, the smartest of you will surely say, "But Nate, that kind of goofiness happens to a lot of us no matter how smart we are. Also, quit using so many fragments, asshole."
And that's fine. Even though I don't think the name calling is necessary.
One of the tricks, I think, to putting up with the stupid around me is by remembering, nay dwelling on, all the moments in my life when I've made mistakes. It really is amazing how much of my life mistakes take up but I don't like to think about that because it depresses the shit out of me. No, I like to focus on the fact that I am, for the most part, an idiot.
That way, when the idiot behind the counter at the sub shop screws up my change for the fourteenth time in a month, I don't lose my cool. I know. I play a wireless keyboard.
That way, when the idiot driver cuts me off and risks both our lives, I am as calm as a vegetable. I once burned down my house.
That way, I can let the dumbass generalizations I hear roll over me like spring water down a mountain or something equally poetic and hopefully less gay. I say a lot of stupid shit.
You see, I understand. I understand why idiots do what they do because I am one. Idiocy is a given in my life because I can't escape me.
Therefore, because I am a part of the idiocy, it cannot hurt me. I have succumbed to its warmth and I am free from the frustration that comes from holding people to high standards.
And I think my stupidity allots me a certain comfort. I am happy, calm and mellow because I have nothing in the way of expectations of other people.
And I play a mean wireless keyboard, too.
234iopweri23jwk5e4;po[w 23lwko5elk\[]5-3.