I hate writing about writing. I especially hate it when writers outline their plans for their future work. I am of the humble opinion that if a man's gonna do something, he should just do it and shut the fuck up about it. Maybe that's just me. I mean, I was raised kind of drunk.
Anyway, despite my dislike for all things planned, there are some issues that should probably be addressed here on The Nate Way. And, since y'all are the ones who read this tripe, I figured I'd solicit your opinions on a few of the issues bothering me and on the ideas of some of our readers. Basically, I'm actually asking you for feedback (God, I feel like one of those pathetic, pity-sex seeking losers who spent high school playing role-playing games and masturbating to the hot chicks on Star Trek).
Without further ado, here are the subjects that The Nate Way needs addressed.
Pictures
Apparently, blogger has decided that I can go to Skokie, Illinois (Hell would be too much fun) and/or just not post any more fucking pictures. According to our fearless editor and resident Hang Man champion, Court Sullivan, I can bypass blogger's attempts to screw me and can post pictures using some kind of html code or something. This would probably take me a few days to figure out because I am very busy and very stupid. Nevertheless, if you guys feel that my lack of graphics is really bothering you, I will do my best to learn how to insert pictures. If you could really give a damn one way or the other, I will continue to do what I've been doing for the last few months (read: nothing). Just let me know if this is a big deal or not.
Links
I have been told by Sully (and yes, I call Court Sullivan, Sully?hey, it's better than Courtney) that I am doing a disservice to my readers by not linking to relevant pieces with any regularity. I find links to be self-serving, but if it is really true that y'all want my pieces to connect, just say the word. Again, if you could give a rat's ass then I, dear reader, will take that furry rodent butt and continue doing nothing (you're welcome).
Mailbag
I am very thankful for all of the emails I get (specifically the death threats and comments on my appearance, writing ability and likelihood of possessing STDs). However, every now and again, a few readers will email me with the same idea, which always makes me think that there are a lot of people out there who feel that same way. The most recent of these ideas were requested by loyal readers Jason H, Mr. Cheekz and Beach Bumbler, all of whom have requested or suggested that I do some kind of advice column/mailbag wherein readers email me questions and comments and I respond in kind. I have rejected the idea because no one ever emails me with the intent to have their emails posted. And, unlike some internet writers, I try not to post emails without permission. Therefore, if you would like to send me an email at nathan@pointsincase.com, and it is your intention for said email to be responded to on The Nate Way, please put the word “mailbag” in the subject heading, or request (somewhere in the body of your email) that you would like your question or comment responded to on the site and not in the privacy of your own inbox.
Statistics
People often email me asking how many people visit my blog and/or columns. Some have even requested that I put up some kind of stat counter to reflect my growing popularity in the world of obscure comedy writers. I think this idea is horrible, but who am I to judge?
Anyway, if you really want to know how many hits I'm getting, please leave a comment to that effect. Personally, I don't see how it could matter, but what the hell do I know? I still drink whole milk and pay on dates.
Anything I Missed
So uh, did I miss anything? Are there any particular issues on your particular mind at this particular time in this particular place? Just let me know.
Oh, and since we're talking one to one about what I'm gonna do and what you want me to do and all that, I figured I'd take this opportunity to thank you for reading.
So, umm, thanks.
Gee, this is kind of awkward.