Short, punchy comedy for readers on the go. New humor lists regularly. Quizzes | Submit a List
Good game, I didn’t mean what I said when I said, “We’re gonna kill this sorry ass team!”
You feel the urge to wash your dentist’s car after each appointment.
The suspicion that we are all just cogs in a hyper-capitalist machine — SANDALWOOD
Anyone who tries to create a paradox gets stopped by theoretical physicist Michio Kaku and his incredible superpowers.
Driver’s Seat of The Car You Still Haven’t Paid Off: If your ancient Volvo is visibly shaking from your pent-up emotions, then you know you’re doing it right!
Wipe down equipment after use with one of the damp napkins placed atop our overflowing garbage bins.
- Both fell off trucks at one point. - Neither speaks French.
The leopard with the feet of a bear and the mouth of a lion is an obvious reference to Ryan Reynolds' dashing good looks.
Congratulations on your new baby! You know what else is new? New York City, where I work and live.
Would you say this survey is currently: - Meeting your expectations - Not meeting your expectations
No one will explain the charge to you, but you are sure it is unjust.
Prompt 4: Do you think you’ll ever grow out of being a nerd?