Weekly funny lists for readers on the go. Quizzes
NPR Program or Slang from Your Gen Z Coworker?
Was that something you overheard on your Zoom call this week, or from the radio in the kitchen? Hard to tell, but lit regardless.
Funny Lists
Things to Eat Instead of Grape-Nuts®
Your own teeth, pulsed a few times in the Cuisinart. / Tiny blue gravel from the fish tank you haven’t cleaned out since your guppy, Lucy, died.
10 Signs You’ve Been Binge-Watching “The Crown” and Need to Stop, Immediately
You were so busy pretending to be a British royal, you didn't even notice that your wife and kids left you and that she changed the Netflix password on her way out.
19th Century Asylum or Modern Daycare?
You approach a crying person and ask what’s the matter. They say, “Nothing.” Seconds later that person is interacting jovially with a colleague.
Mark My Words, If You Don’t Finish This Last Job, I’m Going to Kill You and Everyone You Love
Your parents’ casual acquaintances, who they always promise to make plans with but never do. Your parents’ parents, if they’re like, still around.
Places the Car Might Have Flown Off to at the End of “Grease”
A drive-in movie theater in the sky – Danny and Sandy already went to a drive-in movie on land, so it only makes sense.
Tenant Security Deposit Deductions for 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Item Removal Charge: 660 million expired, room temperature vaccine doses. Attached note: “SEND BACK. Already had virus!”
What Can We Expect from the Next Installment of “Sex and the City”?
Carrie’s new side hustle is: A) Monetizing her signature monologues with a TED Talk! B) Renting out rooms in her apartment on Airbnb.
What Your Favorite Cactus Says About You
Beaver Tail Cactus (Opuntia basilaris) – You act a lot tougher than you are, and long for someone to see through your faux exterior.
Subway Restaurant or Subway Transportation?
There is a half-eaten sub sandwich on the ground. It looks like it has been there for some time. / You're here because you wanted to go "green."
Hickory Dickory Doctor’s Patient Log at Mother Goose Urgent Care
Pt. Jack Sprat re-check of cholesterol ratio and general lipid panel. Wife, however, doing poorly on Nutrisystem and needs to eat leaner.
Can You Decipher the Shakespeare Play from Its Clickbait Title?
“This Isn’t Disney’s Magic Kingdom: Top 10 Do’s and Don’ts When Shipwrecked on the Island of a Vengeful Sorcerer”