Short, punchy comedy for readers on the go. New humor lists regularly. Quizzes | Submit a List
Pfizer Video: $6/month, $720/month without insurance / Costco Flix: $17/month, but only if you agree to stream all the movies together at once
Hard-nosed private investigator Sarah Cream never thought she needed a man—until she met the mysterious (and mysteriously hunky) Peach brothers.
Aries: You’re no conformist! You’ve accepted that and so should the US government. They haven’t though, so you’ll fake your own death.
Graduations: Oprah in black informing Stephen Colbert’s audience that the tests are back and they all have chlamydia.
“Stop your nonsense and drink your whiskey!” / “Fine words! I wonder where you stole them.” / "We are never ever, ever, ever getting back together.”
Coding is a great creative outlet, but only the most talented people become CEOs of publicly traded companies.
Ugh! Bernie Sanders’ Medicare For All plan is just TOO good! Where does this guy get off inspiring a grassroots movement toward economic equality?
Message one of the employers' staff through LinkedIn, Facebook and carrier pigeon about your potential interest. Yes, do all three. Dab!
You hope to start a family because... A) You want to have babies with him. B) You want to raise your children under her shadow government.
The couple that endured Rain On Their Wedding Day realized mid-Hawaiian-honeymoon that they never discussed having children.
Don’t dwell on the minds you’ve violated in the past or plan to violate in the future. Focus on the minds you’re violating in the present.
Was the Fanny Fay Fruit Cake Great Grandma Wrapped Up and Brought to Dinner from a bakery trash can or Fanny Fay Old Folks Home’s Charity Bake Sale?