Short, punchy comedy for readers on the go. New humor lists regularly. Quizzes | Submit a List
Turning your art into a culinary brand doesn't always pan out. Just ask any soft serve operator at the now-defunct Dali Queen.
I “loved” your announcement on Facebook, and left a comment about how excited I am for you. > I find your friendship exhausting.
"Get Rich Media Banners or Die Tryin’" and "Jenny From the Blockchain": these are the kind of tunes best optimized for my life working here.
After playing four straight championships and winning three, fans are asking, "Is there a cactus who could even come close to beating the Warriors??"
Having sex with my wife. She was planning to vote for Kamala Harris and not Beto prior to their sexual encounter.
Attempt to order Chinese food online. Discover credit card is maxed out. Head into kitchen with acute sense of impending doom.
For questions regarding payment, please press X, where X is the gas mileage of a Sherman Tank, plus the hands visible in Da Vinci's The Last Supper.
Raising sons is hard. There are a lot of ways you can screw up your son and add another example of toxic masculinity to society.
Facilitates voyeurism into the lives of others who possess similar units. Provides a platform that helps unite and embolden the forces of evil.
Data leak alert: Your fitting room selfies were just shared with your high school reunion Facebook group.
A prophecy that predicted the deaths of all three of my children was recently fulfilled, but I look fierce as hell in this pixie cut, AMA.
Honey Bunches of Oats > A Small Amount of Good Stuff Swimming in a Large Amount of Oats