Short, punchy comedy for readers on the go. New humor lists regularly. Quizzes | Submit a List
If you woke up and your partner was an Oscar Mayer wiener, how long could your grief stop you from eating them?
- Let’s form our own special select committee - Please be my Majority Whip - We should move forward with a discharge petition
1099-K, BB-8, WA-7, W-9?
Peabody, Maynard, Wantwit, Athol, Muckspout: fastest route to Muckspout or scathing flurry of insults?
You’re willing to fight for what I deserve. You categorically accept my claim that, “This is not entirely my fault.”
Gallegory: Everything in a story represents something else, but only for the ladies. Men still have to read it literally.
Add More Variety to Your Diet: You’ve either forgotten to eat or had eight meals today. Both count.
Including "The Capable Ice Road Trucker" and "The Priest Who Challenged Me to a Rap Battle at My Nephew’s Baptism.”
OK—technically you didn’t ask this, but no, you’re not supposed to sing along.
Go on two dates with me that seem to go well, but then inexplicably ghost me, I’m half Irish
Water (for reference): $0.89/gal Water (digital): $9,132/gal
You can’t win if you don’t play. Don’t let the big one get away!