Humor Columns

Deer Court

Straightforward hunting, outdoors, and general life advice from an optimistic, big-buck whitetail out of Charleston, WV.

You may find yourself over your head when the red tide flows in. But come hell or high water, you've got to show her how much you care.

Whether it's dinner or just coffee, each type of date warrants an appropriate strategy. Find your angle, and then take her out.

Amidst all the whirlwind craziness surrounding your exes, there is a way to find the eye of the storm. Once there, engage in forceful sex.

Has the Middle-Easterner gopher distracted hunters from searching out deer? The answer will surprise you.

Killing a deer involves more than finding any ol' weak spot. Read this article to make sure you're not violating United Forest agreements.

Reader stumbles on helpless doe, struggles with college regrets.

Everyone wants a cool nickname, but you don't get to decide what people call you. Just be glad they're calling at all, Mortimer!

If your girlfriend is being anal about abstinence, there's no use going through the ins and outs with her. Go knock up someone else.

Commitment is about more than steady sex. It's about accepting each other's weird sleeping hours, deranged parents, and juicy farts.

A gritty detective story with twists, turns, and a plot speeding along so out of control it could only have been written by 6 people on meth.

The worst part of being sick isn’t the fatigue, or the pain, or even the price of medicine. It’s the lack of sex. Just ask any of Jerry’s Kids.