Hello, everyone, and welcome to another installment of my comedy morsels. Sit back and enjoy the show. Or sit up and read 'til your eyes hurt. It only takes about two seconds for me.
Explaining Girls Gone Wild Infomercials To A Blind Person
“Oh, damn! Alright, you're gonna like this. It's like a ton of hot, young girls dancing. Looks like they're in a club. You ever been to a club? More shots of girls. They're so fine, man, if only you could see. The girls are shaking their ass, dancing, posing for the camera – OH SHIT! I think this girl's gonna pull her shirt up she's got her hands at the bottom of the shirt – oh my God do it! Do it! DO IT BITCH! Yes, she's – WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT! There's letters over her boobies! I don't understand! NO! They're not showing them, they're not showing them! This is the biggest disappointment in the history of man. I wish I was blind right now.”
New Sayings
Telling your grandma the 40's called, and they want their _____ back.
“They say women only earn 75 cents for every dollar a man makes, but maybe they just haven't been working there as long.”
Yell “Encore!” at the end of every class.
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