I have a confession to make.

Silence does nothing but confuse the fuck out of me.

I would rather have a ‘yes’, a ‘no’, or a string of curse words instead of silence. In my little dream world, “yes” means yes, “no” means no, and a string of curse words mean… I don’t know what they mean, but at least it gives me something to work with. On the other hand, silence could pretty much mean anything. It could mean “I had to go to the bathroom,” to “I don’t know what to say,” to “there was a line, and you crossed it a while ago.” Of course, when you have the amazing imagination that I possess, you can imagine all the wonderful things going through their head.

Or, more likely, you can imagine every single bad scenario, getting progressively worse as time goes by. An example of such evil thoughts goes something like this (I kid you not, some of these thoughts I actually thought):
“I wonder why they haven’t said anything yet. Did they get message? I don’t want to send it again. If I send it again, that might make me look desperate. Shit. What did I do wrong this time? Did I do anything wrong? Shit, I fucked it up. How could I fuck up something as basic as that? I need a guide book to minds of (Insert your group of choice here). Maybe they just don’t know what to say. Right, (your name), it couldn’t possibly be something your dumb ass did because you are just so knowledgeable of everything. You’re the man (your name). You’re the man. If it was me, I would have said something by now. Jesus, even incoherent babble would be welcomed with open arms at this point. They must think I’m an idiot. I should never open my mouth to speak again. I wonder my roommates/parents/significant others keep the liquor? Between liquor and chocolate, who needs people? Speaking of chocolate… is that South Bend Chocolate Company’s Peanut Butter and Chocolate Fudge? There is a God and He loves me!”

I like ending thoughts on a happy note.

The point is, nothing quiet makes more me curious than silence. Silence could mean anything, and none of it is good. Silence could be neutral, like a potty break, but it is never a good sign. Silence makes me think things over and nothing is worse than a girl who has already alternated her conclusion between “yes” and “no” at least five times. All this thought is bound to bring her to back to “Do I even want to…” That is never a good sign, my friend.

Sincerely,
Roxy

P.S. Yes, I do love ending my sentences with prepositions. I believe it keeps me close to my Mid-West heritage… word up.

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