My Family Is Going to Be So Surprised When I Jump Out of This Paper Refuse Bag Today, Yard Waste Collection Day by Robert Criss|March 3, 2022
I Will Bravely Die in a Roman Arena, but Please Don’t Make Me Say “I’m Spartacus” in Front of a Crowd by Rachel Geman|March 2, 2022
The Dollar Bill on the Wall of This Pizza Shop Is Sick of Being Out of Circulation by Sarah Lehman|March 1, 2022
Farm to Table. Table to Fork. Fork to Mouth. Food to Throat. Air to Throat. Hands to Chest. Hands to Chest. Hands to Chest. by Robert Criss|February 28, 2022
I, The Riddler, Can No Longer Afford to Make Costly, Multi-Step Riddles to Torment You by Dylan Fugel|February 26, 2022
You Can’t Judge a Book by Its Cover, Because They All Just Have the Same Colorful Blobs These Days by Simon Henriques|February 24, 2022
That Old Lady You Flipped Off in Traffic Is a Candidate for Sainthood by Daniel Burger|February 21, 2022
I’m the Actor Who Plays Chester Cheetah and I’m Tired of Being Type Cast as a Cheesy Snack-Food Obsessed Cool Dude by Angela Kidd|February 17, 2022
My Sports Analogies Are Much More Sophisticated than You Think, You Losers by Ben Cake|February 16, 2022
Acid Flashback, or Did You Forget to Take Off Your Jacket in a Restaurant? by Brett Miller|February 15, 2022
On Second Thought, Swallowing My Car Keys to Avoid Getting Carjacked Was Probably a Bad Idea by Robert Criss|February 15, 2022
Would You Like to Make a Charitable Donation to Our Payroll Fund? by Michelle Drozdick|February 13, 2022
I’m Sorry for Running Over Our Star Quarterback with the Medical Golf Cart, but It’s Actually Been Worse for Me by Joel Kwartler|February 12, 2022
Please Take Notice: If You Ordered an IHOP Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruity Breakfast between March 14, 2016 and August 4, 2017, You May Be Entitled to Compensation by DS Racer|February 10, 2022
A Travel Ad for Venice, Italy’s Only City Modeled Entirely on a Las Vegas Resort by Emily Zauzmer|February 8, 2022
Perfect Songs for 12 Scenarios When You’re Shaving Parmesan over a Plate of Fettuccine Alfredo and Waiting for the Patron to Say “When” by Gary Almeter|February 7, 2022
I Finished Making My First Batch of Chardonnay for My New Wine Company and I’m Looking Forward to Selling It in 17 Years by Robert Criss|February 7, 2022
We Do It with Dogs: Create a Perfect Shabby Chic Look Organically! by Margo Bartlett|February 5, 2022
Today Is Opposite Day: Here’s How to Not Not (Not?) Get Bullied by an Eight-Year-Old Named Kalley by Kelsey Harper|February 3, 2022
Careers Punxsutawney Phil Is Considering Now That Seasons Are Irrelevant by Andrew Nadeau|February 2, 2022
Because Ayn Rand’s Birthday and Groundhog Day Overlap, You Are Now Trapped in an Endless Loop of Capitalism by Rachel Rose Keller|February 2, 2022
Suggestions from the Suggestion Box at My Teppanyaki Restaurant Where I Make All the Food with My Bare Hands by Robert Criss|February 1, 2022
Are You One of the 74% Of Americans Not Suffering from Anxiety or Depression? by Sarah VanArsdal|January 28, 2022
Top Ten Tips for a Safe and Effective Fire Drill at Euphoria High School by Ellie Poole|January 27, 2022
I Beseech Thee, Land-Lord, for Thy Forbearance with Rently Payments by Alex Connolly|January 26, 2022
Banning Me from Game Night Is Nothing Short of an Orwellian Nightmare by Ryan Ciecwisz|January 24, 2022
Guy Who’s Been Going to the Gym for One Week Answers Your Questions by Hunter Gardner|January 20, 2022
Peloton Instructors Coach You Through Your Mediocre New Year’s Resolutions by Leah Abrams|January 15, 2022
I’m Bob from the Bob’s Red Mill Grain Bags, and I Want to Inhale a Family-Size Bag of Flamin’ Hot Fucking Cheetos by Seth Sawyers|January 14, 2022
Is He Ghosting You or Is He Ghostface from the “Scream” Franchise? by Carrie Pinkard|January 14, 2022
I’m Getting Different Wordles than Everyone Else and It’s Not Going Well by Natalie Mead|January 13, 2022
With a Cursory Knowledge of 3D Animation and a Controlled Dose of a Psychoactive Substance, I’m the Man for Your Bowling Alley Score Screen Needs by Tyler Gooch|January 13, 2022
I Just Returned from Space and I Will Bring It Up at Every Social Gathering by Bryan Brunati|January 6, 2022
Five Ways to Convince Your Friends That Your New Apartment Isn’t Haunted by Joshua Daniels|January 5, 2022
Welcome to La Fromage Glissant, the Five-Star Hotel with the Most Slippery Floors by Eric Farwell|January 5, 2022
All the Species Darwin Discovered in the Galapagos Islands, and How They Tasted by Alex Griffiths|January 4, 2022
Spider-Man Movies Ranked by the Severity of Pain I Experienced Passing a Kidney Stone During the Screening by Ryan Ciecwisz|January 3, 2022
My Life Is Flashing Before My Eyes, but the Cinematography Is Terrible by Joshua Daniels|January 3, 2022
Forget Magic Beans, I Will Trade You These NFTs for Your Mother’s Only Milking Cow by Rob Rooney|January 1, 2022
It’s a New Year! Time to Set Another Realistic Goodreads Goal That You Somehow Won’t Meet by Michelle Milliken|December 31, 2021
I’m “John-At-The-Bar” and Whatever Billy Joel May Say, I Always Followed Corporate Policy by Rachel Geman|December 31, 2021
Geppetto’s Other Marionettes That Didn’t Come to Life by Ryan Ciecwisz and Ian Goldstein|December 29, 2021
