Today’s comedy writing from our literary humor friends around the ‘net, updated hourly.
- Are You Really A Good Person?
- I’ve Been Hired as a Method Actor to Play a Stop Sign and I’m Taking It Very Seriously
- Amazon-produced 007 movie pits Bond against fulfillment center workers who want to unionize
- An Apology from Your Proctologist for Writing Poems About Your Colonoscopy
- Scientists: Things Can Change In An Instant
- 25 Donald Trump Jokes Written By A Precocious 1st Grader
- 19-Year-Old DOGE Agent Running Out of Excuses for Why He Can’t Hang Out With Elon This Weekend
- Sun Tzu’s The Art of Marriage
- We’re Making Finding Out School Is Canceled Fun Again!
- The New David Lynch? I Added Ominous Synth to My Colonoscopy Footage
- Kanye Apologizes for Past Remarks About George W. Bush
- Lists So You’re Trying to Rationalize Rooting for USA Hockey as Our Country Turns into an Autocracy “Remembe...
- Five Guys burger chain on the verge of becoming entirely arsehole-free
- Colonel Mustard Promotes His New Book, If I Did It
- Thank You For Purchasing Your LG Supreme Enlightenment Water Heater
- Don’t Tread on Me—Unless You’re a Billionaire with a Ketamine Addiction, in Which Case I Enthusiastically Support It...
- Short Imagined Monologues Why I Chose to Reenter the Matrix and Be a Living Battery for the Machines “You kn...
- Double Trouble: When Your Cat and Husband Share the Same Gaze
- I’m Staying At The El Dorado
- From “The Chainsaw of Bureaucracy” to “The Hedge Trimmer of My Kids Speaking to Me,” We Ranked Every Tool in Elon’s Shed
- Leon S. Kennedy Shoots Down Chainsaw-Wielding Musk
- Supposed Smart Guy Looking Pretty Dumb About Now
- Political Profile: Eric Adams
- Trump Claims Ukraine Started War
- Man Whose Entire Personality Is Based on Living in Logan Finds Out He Actually Lives in Avondale
- Justin Baldoni Sues Justin Baldoni For Getting Him Into This Mess
- Game Night: Unravel Decades of Family Drama in ‘The Roottrees Are Dead’
- Someone Blocked Your Car In and You’re Out for Blood
- Trump Unable To Focus In Meeting As Pressure Of Booking Kennedy Center Summer Jazz Series Looms
- Red Flag? This Man Has a Dry Erase Board in His Bedroom but No Ideas
- Anti-Woke? This Woman Just Hit Snooze
- Supporting Live Theater? Woman Watches Couple Fight in Public
- I LIVED IT: My Friend Did a Voice for My Cat That Was Totally Wrong
- Elon Musk Shocked to Learn He is Not the First Person to Jerk It to Hentai in the White House
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- The Rules of the United Airlines Fight or Flight Club
- I Will Not Board a Plane to Visit Your Baby
- Government to follow end of Apple’s advanced data encryption with move to ban ‘indecipherable’ Geordie accent
- Government introducing new legislation to force you to cc them on all emails
- Aligning themselves with Trump works out just as well for U.S. hockey players as it did for Ted Cruz
- Microsoft’s Revolutionary AI Produces Sea of Thieves Season 15
- GWOT reenactors gather for disconnected violence, ill-conceived civil projects
- You’re Lucky I’m Doing This — This is the Last Wedding I’m DJing
- Dear Relative, You Can Buy My Love
- How My Parents Imagine My Parenting Choices Vs. How I Remember Theirs
- I’m the Oddly Modern Heroine in this Historical Drama and I Am Here to Make You Comfortable
- Dear Mob, I’m Sorry I Forgot to Throw That Fight
- Take Him Seriously, Not Literally “Take him literally, not figuratively. He’s not much of a reader, so if he’s us...
- Rachel Reeves pledges third WH Smith’s at Heathrow
- Canada annexes 4 Nations Championship
- Government-Owned Steelworks in Whyalla Not Viable Says Guy Behind $600B Nukes Plan
- We’re Sun Chips, And The USDA Said We Can Be Called Vegetables
- Zelensky Says Trump Should ‘Just Accept’ Deal for Canada To Take Over USA
- Become Your Own Expert — Master Orthopedic DIY in 3 Easy Steps
- Man who was happy to see snow for climate change reasons now back to angry
- Devastating: This Image Of Fred Flintstone Chasing Ariana Grande Through A Sewer Is 100% Real, But Everyone Thinks AI Ma...
- 5 Ways To Atone For Making Your Boss Frown
- Wykes Makes a Deal
- 10 Relevant Events in History that were Originated by a Joke
- What, You Think You’re Better Than Me? Now That You Have A Nice Big Fancy Obituary?
- Babysitting Books You Didn’t Ask To Borrow
- Toddler Refuses To Play Second Fiddle to a Music Teacher
- The Weird Aunt’s Guide to Soothing a Baby
- How I’ll Spend Every Minute of My Fifteen Minutes of Fame
- Couple Who Joined Rock Climbing Gym Wondering If They Can Just Do the Swinging and Orgies Part
- In Good Hands: Chaska Uncle Confirms Plane Wouldn’t Have Crash Landed In Toronto If He Were On Board
- Please RSVP To Our Partiful Event If You Plan To Like Tomorrow’s ‘They Said What?!’
- My Google Search History After Investing 10$ in Cryptocurrency
- Mike Flynn appointed Special Envoy to the region between Putin’s ass cheeks
- Mom, Do Balls Have Babies Inside Them?
- A Memo From The Wreath Police
- Help! My Article Is Stuck In Purgatory
- Social Media Cleanse Survival Log
- I Am Your Super-Thin, Yellowing, Old Bed Pillow—Please Put Me Out of My Misery
- “Home For Sale By Owner,” by Erin Potter