Guides and Listicles

Tag: Guides and Listicles

Minimizing: Well, at least saying you’ve “still got it” isn’t vulgar or threatening.

Not enough soda // A side dish that inexplicably calls for three sticks of cream cheese

The children do not eat fruits or vegetables. It’s important that they do not consume any kind of plant, nothing that has been grown of the earth.

I heard you call me a weenie under your breath and that makes it hard for me to focus. Could we all agree to put a moratorium on the word weenie?

I threw out my back yesterday and can’t even move today. I’m going to need to take a sick day. (Translation: My cat is sleeping on my lap)

My house got robbed and my tree did nothing. In fact, I’m pretty sure it gave the burglars the alarm code.

Yes, I want to see my friend’s joke about pouring milk in the bowl before cereal, but I also want a bot to direct me to pussy in bio.

Disappointing Truth: Stonehenge is just another case of mass hysteria. In reality, of course, rocks can’t be balanced on top of each other.

To medal in the Turkey Trot, you have to defeat seasoned fitness freaks and erratic savages who only run once a year.

Stimulate Your Baby’s Senses: But avoid actual stimulants, like coffee and Red Bull.

Don't be fooled by what may look like simple affection. This is a manipulation tactic meant to keep you emotionally reliant on the Narcissist.

To follow the opera’s story, you don’t need to be fluent in Italian, German, or hieroglyphics.