Your Newborn Infant and Other Props That Will Take Your Thirst Traps to the Next Level
Your Four Grocery Bags So You Don't Have to Make Two Trips: These are overstuffed, precariously placed, and definitely digging into your shoulders.
Tag: Guides and Listicles
Niccolò Machiavelli Reviews Children’s Books
Charlotte’s Web: After reading this pathetic book, I threw it from the top of the Duomo, where it landed upon and killed a Political Realist.
I Am the Sticky Brown Kitchen Cabinets and All the Other Bad Choices Landlords Make with Their Rental Properties
Not only are my kitchen cabinets sticky and brown, but they contain condos for giant cockroaches who never pay HOA dues.
Rating the Jobs That LinkedIn Thinks I Can Do
Strategist, Influencer Marketing – What do any of these words mean, and furthermore what do they mean when they’re next to each other?
Advice to Bill Gates from One Divorced Man to Another
If you're like me, I imagine Melinda blindsided you with some out-of-no-where comment about how you’re “constantly projecting yourself onto other people.”
Five Stages of Grief for Struggling Writers
You know what I think? They didn't get it... Yes, they just didn't get it. They let a masterpiece slip away, right under their nose.
8 Reboots That Literally Ruined Your Childhood and Also, Your Half of the Rent Is Due
Childhood = Ruined! Kind of like our trust with our landlord if we don’t get that rent in on time.
Your Horoscope as Told by Shakespeare’s Heroes
Taurus--Titus Andronicus: You are determined and reliable, which will pay off over the years as you climb the career ladder.
How to Pretend You Had Friends Pre-Pandemic: A Phrasebook
“Hi!” (casual) or “Hello!” (formal): These will give the impression that you are used to greeting people and it does not frighten you.
How to Feel One with the Earth When You’re Allergic to Most of It
Sit down and place your feet on the ground and just feel the earth beneath the carpeted floor as you wait for your weekly allergy shot.
Ranking the Top 8 Most Notorious White Boy Summers Throughout History
Summer 312 AD: Constantine Wins and Finds Jesus: Beating your nemesis and then becoming sanctimonious about it? 312 AD was a classic WBS.
Everything I Know About Receiving the Coronavirus Vaccine I Learned from Getting My Weed Card
Don’t get too cute with the disease you’re pretending to have. Obviously, it has to be a qualifying condition, but it should also be believable.