Guides and Listicles | Page 3

Tag: Guides and Listicles

There’s no way you’re shouting “SEX ON THE BEACH, PLEASE” over the too loud music.

Remind yourself that you don’t even like Aperol that much and that everyone who says they do is probably lying, at least a little.

10-4: Truckers believe that it is bad luck to say the number 40 because this was the number of years the Israelites wandered in the desert.

Since Pink Eye is usually thought of as a children’s illness, there is a level of grossness that comes with admitting you have it.

THE BOSS: This is your BOSS. It’s in all caps, because he (it’s a man, always a man) wants you to be clear that he is your BOSS.

The Owner of My Once-Beloved Bodega: He’ll call her Boss in the same velvety tone that once stilled my heart.

Bar Harbor, Maine: Honk if you love pine trees! So chic, so luxe, so full of rose-soaked French fries and whoopie pies for the stealing.

Instead of focusing on what the driver hit (a tree), or nearly hit (another tree), remember to notice the things they didn’t hit.

The Airport: For domestic flights, you should wake up at 4 a.m. and drive directly to the airport, no matter what time of day the flight is.

Milk is fucking expensive. Let the cows bring me both my free dairy and the ability to skip the long Sunday checkout lines at the local Target.

Don’t end up on a hilarious, reality prank show like "Milk or Sumo!"

This is also a good time to unwrap any candies or cough drops for which you anticipate a need and to pre-chew noisy crackers.