Guides and Listicles | Page 7

Tag: Guides and Listicles

In the hours leading up to the heist, the vault-code-deciphering guy walked around complaining about the high pollen count.

2. Wear it as a Halloween costume! There’s nothing more terrifying than the repercussions of the wedding-industrial complex.

Whoever wins announces total dominion over all of humanity and also, they get to go first the next round.

Slang names for pickleball include lazy tennis, geriatric badminton, and "a weak excuse to drink Gatorade."

Our previous policy of zero in-office hawk attacks has been slightly adjusted to a new policy of many hawk attacks.

Visit The Zoo: The animal kingdom accepts open displays of weeping.

You Can Mention Frankie Muniz, But Don’t Harp on It: This feels like an obvious one but it is worth mentioning.

If the deer flares its nostrils, it means that when you debut a new outfit, at least two people will notice and compliment you on it.

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte – "Reader, I married him. It appears Hinge was the dating app intended to be destroyed."

Only when determined to be A Good Dude or A Pretty Good Dude, will This Dude I Know become My Buddy.

I decide not to say “please” or “thank you” and I’m immediately pummeled to death by a diner waitress.

Be prepared to answer questions like, “What about all of those blurry photos he left on my phone?”