The Biden 2020 Nevada Pizza Party Is Going Down in Flames
He's targeting young people voting in their first elections, but we have to convince him that “Virgin Voters for Biden” is not how we want to brand.
Tag: Satire and Parody
Space Force Wants You!
The lightweight uniforms of Space Force feature “Drip-Nip Technology©" that can resist water, whether it’s a splashdown or an unexpected “swirly."
An Intervention from Your Rescue Dog
Did you pick me up in a Subaru Outback? Full of NPR tote bags? I’m still a wild animal. And not the kind that’s gonna stop you from having a seizure.
I’m a Serial Killer and Burberry Just Discontinued My Signature Strangling Scarf
With so many murders happening each year, it’s extremely difficult to develop and sustain a calling card that’s distinct.
After Two Years of Emotional Misdirection, I’m Ready to Propose to the Love of My Life
She thinks I forgot what park it was! We walked by it two months ago and she said “Look! Do you remember?” and I said “What?"
What We Used to Call Him
We used to call him Champ, because he led the basketball team to the championships. Then we called him Let Down, because he missed the winning shot.
My 2020 Self-Care Routine
I read an article called “Ten Reasons Why Crying is Good for You” and shed a few tears. For health reasons. I wonder what, exactly, flavonoids are.
Why Was I Charged with a Felony for Simply Taking Home Some Office Supplies and My Boss’ Bank Account Number?
Nobody in the office will miss their paper clips and pens and you know what? My boss, Mr. Thompson, doesn’t even spend his money anyway.
Not to Play Devil’s Advocate but Here Is a Factually Incorrect Point
What was I saying? Oh, when you were talking about racism, I agree with that. Well, sort of. I mean I agree that racism used to exist, which is bad.
Romeo and Juliet Respond to an Apartment Listing
Is there a balcony where I can easily repledge my devotion to my true love? There simply must be a balcony.
Kaplan & The Knot Present: LSAT Logic Games Prep, Wedding Edition
Practice Set 1: Seating Chart Chaos: You and your fiance must seat 7 members of your bridal party (all of whom went to college together) at one table.
Kissing Games: The Playtest Notes
All the kisses started to look the same, and I was kind of bored by the time it was my turn. Could each kiss include progressively more tongue? (Oswald)