Satire and Parody | Page 178

Tag: Satire and Parody

“Are you sure Mr. Wayne needs these titanium bomb doors to his---uh, what’s this room for again?” one worker asked.

Our organic farm-to-table eatery is now also BYOM (Bring Your Own Meals). That’s right. You bring the food, we bring the vibes.

Anyone know what jail Tommy is in? Maybe we could bring the reunion to him! Would be like the good ole days!

I could tell he wasn’t like our past professors. There was a glimmer in his eye, a look that seemed to say: “I have had adventures with horses.”

That’s it. No need to risk making promises you can’t keep or guarantee sweeping policy reform that is realistically unattainable in the short term.

Quitticisim (kwit-??siz?m): The paralyzing decision to either delete or refresh Twitter every thirty seconds.

Let me wipe off the shaving cream and stow my kit bag where the emergency phone used to be.

Who better to speak to my abilities than someone who was around me during my formative years, which I spent using Romeo and Juliet as a pillow?

Truth is, all of us at USPS are trying to reach you/Because you checked off premium shipping without paying for that feature.

It's not that I’m afraid of commitment—I just don’t want to start something that’s not right for me.

Also, need I remind you, I didn’t try to lasso the waiter with it---I did lasso the waiter with it.

At our first show without the droning hum of our generator, it was scary to launch into our opener, a cover of “The Big Rock Candy Mountain.”