Satire and Parody | Page 222

Tag: Satire and Parody

If your friend's team was the one that eliminated your team, tell them they can see you at your funeral.

"Gone in 60 Seconds": I watched until they stole their first car, which was, fittingly, 60 seconds. I got the gist. Commence make-out.

When finally he stepped out onto the moon, he spoke those iconic first words: "Look what I did.... all by myself… with no one's help."

If I’ve already showered I’ll typically just pour something sticky on my head like honey or maple syrup and pretend it was an accident.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: This one’s about people from different backgrounds coming together to fight for a greater good. Skip!

Yes, I sold ad space at the end of that paragraph. Yes, I know that the end of the first paragraph is traditionally where the humorous premise goes.

Please insert your chip into the card reader. Please please insert your card. Please please please. Please society. Please the machine. Chip card.

The only problem with Heaven is that it doesn’t last long, depending on how strong your beans are, and so the key is to keep drinking more of it.

Now that we’re well into our session, stop and rearrange your bookshelf. Go ahead. It’s like productive procrastination which is almost meditation.

Every day the farmer moans about how he’s worried he’ll have no crops to sell this year and won't be able to afford his mortgage, blah blah blah.

Staring into a man's eyes as you plunge a dagger into them is what person-to-person skills are all about. What better way to learn these life skills?

Use the (Space) Force: Lavender, yuzu, and citrus form their own sixth military branch... mission: self-care!