I Am Your Father’s Man Cave
When your dad turned 48, he felt a helpless desperation welling up in his chest. Now, this giant marble sculpture of Dolph Lundgren's abs fill the void.
Tag: Satire and Parody
I Tested How Realistic Clue Is by Killing Six People in a Mansion
To test how realistic the mysterious Clue is, I killed six different people, each with a different weapon, in various rooms of an old gilded age mansion I rented.
Did You Not Wash Your Hands After Pooping on the Boss’ Desk?
Gary, I've called you into HR today not because you defecated onto Mr. Peters’ desk, but because you clearly didn’t even make an attempt to wash your hands afterward.
Lovers Divided (The Unhappy Accident)
So you were still cheating on me, you were drinking again, and you killed me! Did I leave anything out, you jerk? Now look where you've gotten us!
I Don’t Want This Suck & Fuck to Start Getting Political
Suck & Fuck does not belong to anyone. It is a car-based, non-profit sexual marathon open to all members of the public, so long as they adhere to the rules.
I’m Beginning to Have Second Thoughts About Joining This Apocalyptic Death Cult
There's no one thing that's bugging me about the death cult; it just seems like every few days another annoyance breaches the surface, and they're starting to add up.
“Amazon Prime Baby” Eliminates Barriers to Parentry
Amazon Prime Baby uses an algorithm designed to evaluate parental fitness based on Amazon order history as a means to simplify the process of infant acquisition.
Living With My Boyfriend’s Hulkamania
On the surface, it would probably seem that my boyfriend Jack and I have the perfect relationship. Lurking beneath the surface, however, is a dark, WWE-related secret.
Trump Beach Volleyball
A three-on-three volleyball game is about to start in the sand only a seashell's toss from the Trump Ocean. Ben Carson, John Kasich, Marco Rubio, and Chris Christie are there.
This Goddamn Computer is Going to Save Our Family
1946 is going to be a good year for us, my blessed family. Because with the last of our savings I've purchased us a state of the art home computer!
Trump vs. America: The Boxing Match of the Century
In the left corner, weighing in at 225 pounds, the outspoken real estate tycoon egotist, Donald Trump. And in the right corner, weighing in at 50 trillion, the native land, USA.
Ocean’s 65 and Over
Ever seen Ocean's Eleven? They were experienced. Here's exactly how I imagine an ATM caper could be pulled off best by retirees.