I Got into Law So I Could Make Up a Nickname and Put It on Billboards
As a child, I looked up at those billboards and marveled at their power. Could you just choose a nickname?
Tag: Satire and Parody
Thanks for Babysitting, We’re So Sorry
You’re very welcome to watch a movie, but little Olivia has chewed the arrow buttons off the remote so it will have to be the Paw Patrol movie.
Let’s Not Make Fun of the Guy Playing “Total Eclipse of the Heart” on the Jukebox, He’s Probably Going through a Lot
Maybe he needs to hear it very badly for whatever marriage-related problems he’s going through. If I had to guess, of course.
The Book of Genesis, If God Was Creating a Party
And God said, “Let there be great music so none of them talk to each other,” and there was a DJ who worked in finance but DJed on the side.
Finally, Some Representation for Virgins in Politics!
He’ll make sure every American has access to basic libido killers, like subscriptions to the Criterion Channel and graphic tees that say “Mommy’s Little Gamer.”
Yes, I’m Superman, but I’d Rather Talk About My New Jazz Album
I may be able to melt steel with my laser vision, but I can also melt faces with my dazzling clarinet solos.
Actor Bios for Your Town’s Fourth Production of “Shrek: The Musical”
I keep trying to bring up how none of us know our new lines or fit into our new costumes, but Duncan just keeps shouting, “That’s showbiz, baby.”
When You Shop My Balloon Bouquet Small Business Where I Blow Every Single Balloon by Mouth, You’re Supporting Real People
All mouth-blown, no helium balloon pumps allowed! And when I say “we,” I really mean just me.
I’m an Hermés Sales Associate, and You Need to Get the Fuck Out
We are here to serve scorn and derision, and able to discern the net worth of patrons with a half-second, contemptful glance.
The “Micky Mouse Pancakes” on Our Kids Menu Are Not Affiliated with the Walt Disney Company
Smiling or otherwise expressive mouse head-shaped pancakes are trademarked.
I’m a WGA Member on Strike Using LinkedIn for the First Time
Every non-union job listing, for companies like BoatSwatch, Amalgamated Hunter, and A.I. Wurxs.
As a “Short King” Please Understand I Am Duty Bound to the Magna Carta
Con: Quite frequently we will have leave during movie night to oversee the search for knights and an exorcist.